I read somewhere;
A girl after her breakup when was asked the either she left the guy or the guy left him
She said in low voice
’ Neither of us left its LOVE who left us ’
It made me startle for sometime and made me go some where back. Not centuries back obviously but years back…
Mujhe naheen pata main behan hon ya beti , maa hon ya bewi . Sayed sirf rishton k naam par roz dhoka khanay wali ik aam si larki. Mujhe aj tak apna qasoor pata naheen chal saka. aj agar maa baap ki suno to bewafa kehlati hon kia Mohaabat jurm hai, agar hai to meray maushray main basnay walay mard ye kaise kar saktay hain. Mera jee chahta hai mujeh phank lag jain or main kaheen badlon main dor urh jaon kabhi na aon. Phir ye khayal ata hai k parinday b sham dhalte he apne gharon ki rah dekhte hain. Bas wo lamha kathan jan kar main ye zulm sehti hon. Ye log kia bekhabar hain k ikhtiyar anay k bad bhi agar main inka saath deti hon to bas waja he mohabbat hai jo mera jurm hai. Or agar mohbbat jurm hai to phir kon si rishtedari, kaisa rishta, kahan ki dosti or kaisa taluq? har cheez maya hai. Mera bhi jee chahta hai kabhi to ho koi mujhe na rokay, koi na tokay, kabhi to kahay k han tum azzad ho jo chahe karo… Islam k anam par ma, behnon or betiyon ka qatl karne walon kia tum naheen jante yeh humari raat o din ki duain hain jo tum par RAB mehrbaa’n hai. Jis din ye hath uthna ruk gaye tum neest o nabood hojaoge…
Faqt,
ik Sanf-e-nazuk… Ik Na – Muraad…
- illusiOn~
P.S( all fiction)
Mujhe naheen pata dukh jab shadeed hojata hai to insaan kaisa mehsoos karta hai. Par in hichkiyon k darmiyan main apne ap ko hawa maulaq dekh rahi hon ik aisi jaga jahan koi naheen hai na he kisi k honay ki talab baqi hai. Inhathon se behnay walay har ik khoon ki bond mujhe zindagi ki ranaiyon ki taraf se khench kr maut k mun main dakhail rahi hai. Han ye sach hai zindagi khubsurat hai or achay humsafar hon to yeh haseen tar hai magar yahan humsafar ki ab gunjaish kahan. H’an hosakta hai main bach jaon magar main ye yaqeen rakhti hon k boht se logon k liye meri khatum hoti sansain bas safar ki akhri lamhaat hain. Han main har gayi … koi dukh naheen hai mujhe yeh mannnay main k main har gayi. Kiun dukh hoga wo bhi is baat ka mujhe ehsaas hai k ghalti hogayi. Or ghum yeh hai k itnay arsay main fareeb main rahi aj apne apko dekhun bhi to mar janay ko jee chahta hai. Ye khoon ka behna maut ki alamat na bhi ho, hosakta hai ye sehr-e-nau ki naveed ho magar yeh mera wada hai agr zindagi ki zara bhi ramak is jism-e-natawa’n main ab rahi to naye janum ko na mannay wali main MUSALMAAN ik nayi zindgai zaroor shuru karungi un logon k baghair jinhon ne aj mujhe tor dia.. Asaan naheen magar na-mumkin bhi naheen…
TO ALLAH I BELONG AND TO HIM I WILL RETURN!!!
- illusiOn!
( All fiction )
without me talking to you… its been long yes I know but things were unbearable. I love you so much for listening to my hidden fears. I know I am being very unpredictable person . Sitting out in open air with just chair in whole place as the only furniture I love things .. But life isn't easy I must say and even I am not that easy. I even don’t know what I am writing, will that be making any sense even or not but if today I didn't write today I will be like killing myself somewhere deep down in me..
- illusiOn ~
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