Head n Heart game… (part 2)

Next 3 days went like usual I didn’t even had a glimpse of him. I don’t know why but yes I was thinking about him all the time. My brother was still angry so he was forgiven and with that  On the third day when I was convinced that it all was the result of all the romantic fantasized novels I love to read but hey! as far as I know I am a very practical kind of person. Though I enjoyed reading them but since when I started believing them? I cursed my self. I rushed back home and quickly I changed my clothes for nap. I love sleeping, as it was so far my only love. I escape lunch and lied on my bed but couldn’t sleep again with him on my head I mean WTF is wrong with me. I made myself assured that tomorrow only I am going to do something about it not assured of what but yes something. Later that evening I was informed that I need to go along with my parents to attend a wedding. While looking for a suitable dress I empty my whole wardrobe and I chose a green dress. I went near mirror and place it next to my body and I looked in mirror and there I saw him again. He was there sitting in my open window, the best corner of my room. His eyes were focusing me and I again couldn’t find enough strength to turn and say anything to him… I looked down avoiding him and I heard him speaking for the very first time.

‘ Why don’t you try this red! ’ He pointed out red which was gifted to me by a friend of mine. A very traditional work of thread with combination of green and coffee color which was  enhancing the beauty of red…

I looked up and he was not there, I cursed myself and I was sure that I was suffering from hallucination and that’s sit.  I was still with that green frock in front of mirror  when my sister came in. Frowning face as if she is going to vomit and as this clicks my mind I just think a bit loud;

‘ If you are feeling like vomit I should be clearing you that this is not your washroom but my room so please… ( I mumble LEAVE ) ’.
‘ I know its useless coming to you, you FAUNA! mama wants you to hurry up ’ she left …  I sighed and dressed in green avoiding my heart which was forcing me to get dressed in red O_O. I put on my accessories, shoes and I rushed down. Through out the function I was seeking him. I was having a feeling that he is watching me. Later that night we step back home and step in my room with small and silent steps but my room was empty. To be honest I was disappointed not because of him but because of my thoughts, may be because I wanted him to be with me. I changed my clothes, re-arrange my ward-robe and I sat down resting my back with bed’s wall  with close eyes. People say when you need a quick rest close your eyes, I believe when you need to think a bit high and loud close your eyes as this way your mind just don't follow the ways your eyes shows but it discovers more. I don’t know why but I missed my friends, the older ones who once were with me but now they are no more in my life. May be I am wanting him just because of vacant space in my life… I slept there only thinking,reasoning and predicting him when someone touched me…

(Continued)

- UnhingeD

Head n Heart game… (part 1)

Like every other time I faced fight of my family over me bravely and quietly left the lounge as I knew its useless standing there nobody is going to feel me while they are way too busy. My family is cool but I guess I am just the odd one out ever since I open the eyes and cried ( my birth time) … I sighed and took step ahead towards the yard side . It was small but enough for me as it was the only thing that was sustain by my family and it didn’t go through a renovation like exterior and interior of my house after my grand fathers death. As I sat on the only bench there I again had the same feeling of having someone around me. Someone who is close to me and could see me. I turned around and I looked down the bench and every possible place but again was unable to see anyone. The odd thing was I was fine with the presence though could feel someone's breath down my neck. I placed my head on bench  and before I could shut my eye lids I saw someone. I open my eyes wide, the guy was sitting on the wall. I blink my eyes but could not possible strength to talk to him so I just stared him for long . I heard my sister calling me and I turned to see but when I turned back I saw no one… He was disappeared O_O . I went back to my room after sometime and opened my books for next days assignments. I usually used to sleep by 1:30 a.m but because of work I stayed up till late. It was 3:00 a.m when I was giving final touched to my work and had to rush to my room to bring water as I was working on terrace as my room wasn’t enough for all this mess. I came back with in no time and his presence took my breath away. He was sitting on one of the couches giving my work a closer look. My footsteps made him look up and he smiled and I fainted. I put my whole strength not to behave like fools. He was probably making me scared that’s sit. I made myself believe that he was card of my nasty brother who was mad on me since he was accused by dad because of me though it was all unintentional. I ignored him and started packing my work I opened the case and carefully packed my sheets within plastic ones and placed them in the case. While doing this I looked up and was about to scream as the couch was empty, he disappeared again!  I was turning mad or …

(continued)

- UnhingeD!

To God, With Love ! - ( From The Dark Tunnel )

And then after so many days of mistrust and disbelief I finally decide to write to God. You must be thinking how fool I was then did I ask you think or tell me what you are thinking . I sat down on top most roof constellate with stars , moon observing me and I wrote down;

To Allah!

I don't know but I am very dishearten  by you, help me gaining my faith back. I don't know why all this happened but it did and I am not liking it at all now its your responsibility to make feel better instead of living it on time to heal me. I am yours and this is the only reason I am writing this letter to you. I know people here will take me as an insane but when I care about it? Did I? No! Allah I know something better is hived away in near future but then why we pray and ask things from you if you are going to provide things in a better way, in its best shape? Why you said in Al- Quran that you give to those who ask you to? I don't know if my talks make sense to anyone but I know it will to you I am sure as you are my creator. If my mum understands me so well so does my dad then I am dead sure YOU the one who love me more then 70 mothers surely understands me far better then I understand myself. Help me! I know you are around somewhere near me but still I need you. I know things will go by and then I will be on a track towards success but this is hurting me. I know people who are consoling me are resource of you only but this way its hurting even more. Sometime I feel like drowning myself somewhere but then I remember how difficult it was for me to recover from it last time.

Waiting for an answer!

Love you Allah ..

And I wiped my tears off and tear the page from the diary and it flit away before I could grab it .. I smiled Allah definitely was watching me and this wind took my letter to him.. =) ..

TO BE CONTINUED..

- illusiOn ~

Words when do magic..

I am overwhelmed with a burning desire, a desire locked down deep inside, one that can't be concealed anymore, i long for one sweet kiss from you to quench my thirst, i long for one tender touch that will last a lifetime, at the end of it all you are my deepest desire...

:) Thanks Friend.. for sharing this...